Dear Rachel and Baltazar's Baby: You Are Going to be a Star.

This entry is dedicated to my new favorite baby on the block, LittleRachelAndBaltazar (LRAB for short) who's so fucking hipster, he listens to bands you haven't heard of and HE.HASN'T.EVEN.BEEN.BORN.YET.Dear LRAB,One day (when I'm even more rich and famous than I am today) you will read this blog entry and all of the mysteries of the world will be solved. I'm going to tell you a little story of how your parents met and you're going to enjoy it.These were high school days. Your dad did all this rock band stuff (like REAL rock bands, none...

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Polish Food in the Hizzouse.

Helloooooooo again!!!I know I've TOTALLY been neglecting the food part of this blog, but to be honest with you I haven't had my usual voracious appetite these past few weeks. In fact, my food selections have been downright suicidal. But don't worry, I'm totes bringing sexy back. And by bringing sexy back, I mean I cooked dinner tonight.Tonight's menu: PierogiesYou will need the following items:Pierogies. If you've never tried them before, pierogies are like little pasta pockets filled with mashed potatoes and cheese. They come in other...

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Auto Response: Out of the Office

Guess what?!I'm totally being lazy... a post will come one of these days, I'm sure. But for now, you'll have to deal with...MEeEeEL GIBSOoOoOoN!!!Really fucking hilariously cuckoo...? Or just misunderstood...? Discuss...(And for anyone who's been living on planet NoClueWhatsGoingOn, you can listen here...

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MORE AWARDS?!?! Dreams are coming true, folks...

Mega sorries for the delay since my last post. If you're anything like I imagine you are, I'm sure all 6 of you have had some pretty restless nights and many days were spent viciously refreshing your blogroll.So I'm back. And guess what! (I know. There's no surprise because I can't keep a secret and already spilled those beans up there in the title.) I have more aWaRdS!!!Shall I do the honors?? Of course, I shall.Thankyou thankyou thankyous to my new internet besties (Note: Anyone who gives me an award gets an automatic promotion to...

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Opinions... I Need Some.

Essiting news- I'm gonna be featured on a comedic community blog in a few weeks! I mean, it's not like they hand picked me or anything. It's more like you just submit an entry and they tell you when it's going to be posted. But still, I'm essited!So I submitted my entry back on like day 2 of my blog... aka, when I wasn't very funny. I want to do a switcharoo to up my funny in time for the post and I need your help. Which blog entry is your favorite??? (Please make sure to limit yourself to one of MY blog entries, thank you.)In other food news...Today I grabbed lunch at a new Jersey Mike's that just opened up three weeks...

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Happy Birthday, America... (there WILL be profanities)

Hope you had a festive and embarrassingly patriotic 4th of July. Here's how mine went...Keith had a great evening for us planned. We were going to enjoy the fireworks in Long Beach on the Queen Mary aaaaand do a mini ghost hunt, which is something I've been wanting to do like basically all my life. Dreamy? Check. Festive? Check. Entertaining? Check. Except nobody told the city of Long Beach about these great plans of ours.As soon as we exited the freeway, traffic is backed up because they have three lanes funneled down to one. As each...

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You're Going Places Award!

Look at that- a Christmas miracle! Someone has given me another award. The first time around I was convinced that one of my internet besties had made an internet error and cut/paste the wrong blog url somewhere. But now that I've received my second award, I'm pretty sure it's just because my blog is off-the-chain magical and gets you VIP service in Hollywood clubs.Big ups to Island Gal for bestowing upon me the You're Going Places Award. Thank you, thank you, and once again I'd like to thank the academy. And by academy, I mean the mountain...

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