31 is the New Black. (Part 1)

Last Friday was my birthday!!! Yes, my birthday really is on April Fools! And yes, I really am the big old boring 31. Somehow it seems like 30 was more acceptable, like it was still grouped with the 20's, so I was cool with last year's birthday. But I feel like 31 is kind of grouped more with the 40's and I'm feeling old and like my obsession with Judge Judy is all making sense now.


Anyway.


Friday night we had a few friends over for my birthday party. It wasn't anything big because I'm not rich and everyone knows house parties always SEEM cheap, but end up costing $arm and $leg because you wouldn't be caught dead running out of food or drink so you always stock up enough to feed 20x the amount of people actually invited. Originally, I couldn't make up my mind about how I wanted to spend the evening: A nice dinner out with Boyfriend... Inviting a bunch of friends out to the pub... House party... I opted against the private dinner because we can really do that anytime. And I nixed the pub because all of my friends are married avec kids and they can't get sitters and don't have money to blow at the bars (that makes two of us) and act like recluses at the mere mention of going out in public. So all things considered, I was very happy to have a little get together at home.


Since I'm not a fancypants, everything at my party was on the cheap. I purchased Pillsbury Funfetti cupcake mix and frosting and made the cakes myself.



Party hats and plates: Dollar bin at Target.



My favorite decoration of all: The birthday banner that Boyfriend made on the down low.




The party menu consisted of chicken dino-bites, frozen CPK pizzas, chips, veggies and dip. Why? Because I like them.



The night was spent shooting the shit while drinking White Russians, PBR's, and shots of whiskey.











Once everyone was nice and too-liquored-up-to-be-embarrassed, we fired up the ol' Rock Band.











And don't forget the gifts and cake.



The rager lasted into the wee hours of 12:30am. (We're wild. I know.)

I really had SUCH a great time and I'm so grateful for all the cool people in my life- friends, family, bloggers, commenters, etc. I'm really not even joking. Looking back and knowing I was thiiiiiiiis close to canceling my party because I got in a funk Thursday night (thanks for slapping some sense into me, Boyfriend), I'm so glad I didn't.

Happy Birthday to me.

The birthday festivities continued all weekend long, so expect like two more entries about this booshet. For now, I'll leave you with a quick vid from me and Biscuit.

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Questions... I'm Still Taking Them!

We're down to the last few days to submit questions/ topics for my video blog- THANK YOU so much to the people who already submitted! Any last minute stragglers, you have all day today to come up with some real doozies.

I understand some of you MAY be shy, what with my celeb status and shit. But trust me, I'm totally not a big deal (unless you count those times I hung out with Paris Hilton and Cesar Milan). We're all friends here, right? Right...??

Or maybe you just don't know what to ask. In which case, I've come up with some ideas to help get your creative juices flowing:


Hey TILTE- What's it like working in a dental office?



Hey TILTE- What are your tips for raising a friendly and loving puppy??

-OR-

Hey TILTE- Why the fuck did you take hot pink capris when you went backpacking in Europe???


Email me at TILTE@live.com!!

PS: I'm hungry.

In Other Nonsense...

I did a little updating and added some new features on my blog. Feel free to give me a "Digg" or "Like" on any entries that catch your eye. And don't be discouraged by the fact that all your friends will know what kind of mindless drivel you like reading. They're probably into stuff that's way more embarrassing anyway (I'm looking at you, people-who-watch-The-Tyra-Banks-show).

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I was Tagged- Stuff I Love.

The always sweet and fashion savvy NikosMommy at Fabulous! (Pasta Not Included...) tagged me in a post about My Favorite Things. She must know how much I like to talk about myself.

Let's get this party sharted!

FIVE CURRENT LOVES

1. Topsiders. If you don't know what these are, just imagine the shoes you'd wear sailing your boat around Cape Cod while eating oysters and sporting a cardigan tied over your shoulders. Yep. Those are the ones.

Except I prefer they not be ratty and beat up like my pair above. Um. I'm not sure if you can tell by my quality pic or what, but they're old as hell. And I wear them, like, everyday. I saw a brown pair of Sperry Topsiders at The Rack the other day, and although I'd really prefer the blue pair, saving myself $25 (plus shipping) is totally how I roll. Fingers crossed I get drunk enough this weekend to not care about spending money.

2. Red/ White/ Blue Stripes. I love striped clothing, especially in those colors. If it makes me feel like a wealthy, nautical, yacht-owning person and/or a French mime, I NEED IT. Important Note: NOT to be confused with American flag themed attire.

No,these are not dust rags. They're my actual clothes.


3. Uncrustables. That's right. I'm talking about those circle shaped bites of Heaven that are found in your local freezer section. Listen friends, I don't even LIKE peanut products and I've been eating these every day for the past three weeks straight out of SHEER.ADDICTION.

It's like crack served between two slices of Weber's bread. :::droooool:::

4. My New Tattoo. Okay, so here's the story with the tattoo. The first gift Boyfriend ever gave me was a little keychain character called Poop Dog. I fell in love instantly and it's actually one of the reasons why I think Boyfriend is so great.

With all this recent shit with my health going on, I've realized what a caring and positive support Boyfriend has been. Aaaand since we'd both been wanting to get a tattoo for a while (and wtf am I waiting for already) we decided to get matching tattoos.

What! I know!

It didn't take long for us to decide what we wanted...

I know, I love it too! We're.So.Bad.Ass.


5. Mark Ronson's Bang Bang Bang. I've been obsessed with this song since I first heard it last summer and my love for it still hasn't waned in the slightest.



Mark Ronson and the Business Intl - Bang Bang Bang on MUZU.

I'll tell you why I love everything about this song.

-It involves two of my favs: Speaking French and Japanese game shows
-Nutella
-80's influenced video
-It makes my ears drool every time I hear it
-Synthesizers
-Mark Ronson is a babe-a-rino
-I get to put my four years of French to work
-Star Tours-like effect with the shooting stars
-The whole Ronson family is a little cuckoo and therefore I love them
-The girl in the beginning of the video looks like a little TILTE

Enough said.

FIVE QUESTIONS

Favorite Make-up Brand: Well, I'm totally not a brand loyal shopper and I'm really not the best at taking care of my skin. I'd like to say M.A.C. because it brings out my inner drag queen, but I really only have, like, 5 M.A.C items in my whole makeup bag. If we're going to be honest here, I'd probably use colored chalk in my face if I felt I could get away with it.

Favorite Clothing Brand: I don't have a favorite clothing brand either. I like to mix my shit up and shop everywhere. And by everywhere, I mean everywhere that's cheap. I'd say most of my closet consists of thrift store finds, Target, and Forever21. But I'll tell you what I stear clear of- anything with logos or a brand name plastered across it, Uggs, and obviously Ed Hardy. (Obviously.)

Your Indispensable Makeup Product: Lip gloss. It not only brings some life to my shit, it can also double as blush when you're in a pinch. (I know it's a Grandma move, I don't care.) Without that little bit of color on my face, I'm in total crypt-keeper mode.

What Country Would You Like to Visit and Why: (Let the bragging commence...) Wellllll, since I've already been to... France, England, Spain, Italy, the Netherlands, and Greece... I'm going to say I'd like to visit an island resort. Like St. Barts or something. Does that count? I think I'd also like to go to Japan and maybe Argentina.

What is the Last Concert You're Been to: I know this will cause shock and awe amongst you all, but I've never been to a concert. I mean, one time I saw Cake play at a small venue when I went to the Sundance Film Festival, but 1. it was hardly a "concert", and 2. Cake? Seriously?? So... As for concerts I would really love to see, I'm going to say top three would be Air, Ladytron, and Beck.

Alright ladies- tag, you're it.

Stephanie C @ Seriously??... Reeeally?... Seriously?

Bonnie @ Glam Kitten's Litter Box

Coyote Rose @ Dancing on the Bar of Life

Lorraine @ Late to the Party

Kara @ Sunshine Cupcakes

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Pubic Service Announcement.

Ok, I want to take a moment to point out that in between my last two poop entries the unthinkable happened.

I lost a follower.

Maybe my butthole hijinx are too much for some people's fragile eyeballs, but I don't think I really ever write about anything TOO weird or unacceptable. My point in sharing these stories with you is partly (hopefully) to give you something to laugh at, but also just to share my random experiences. I'm not getting paid to go out and look for weird shit to blog about- this weird shit is just my life.

(Important Note: I'm totally open to getting paid if anyone out there wants to commission my work.)

Maybe my honesty is too much for certain readers, in which case that's fine. Unfollow. I only want followers who enjoy my writing and stories anyway. -That's actually not true, I'll take followers whether they like me or not. But seriously folks, it's fine if this isn't your thing.

Now that I got that shit outta the way, I want to tell you all about Studio30Plus. It's like a social networking site for bloggers over 30. I only just recently joined (the website and facebook page too) and I'm still totally new to it all. So imagine my surprise when I saw I was nominated for the BEST FEMALE BLOGGER AWARD!!!!!!

Dudes, I'm not even shitting you right now. People like me (I use the word "people" loosely. I really only needed one vote to make it through to this round.) I'm totally not expecting to win because I'm way too new to this game and haven't worked up nearly enough PR to rig that shit in my direction. But I'm soOoOoo excited to even be nominated. In honor of making it this far, I'm going to celebrate this weekend by wearing one of my fanciest dresses and eating banana splits while watching tivo'd episodes of Millionaire Matchmaker.



So go to their website and vote. And maybe even send them messages on facebook harassing reminding them how great I am. (I don't even know if that would hold any credibility, but it's worth a shot.)

File this one under B for "bragging".

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Shit on My Phone.

I got this idea from Debs over at Fashion Plate. She had an entry about photos on her phone. So the other day when I was clearing out some old shit on my phone I came across some goodies (and some not-so-goodies). But whatever, I'm still sharing.

While uploading the photos, I noticed some running themes so I grouped them together by category. However they pretty much all fall under the main category, DOING ANYTHING BESIDES PAYING ATTENTION TO THE ROAD.

Cars That Make Me Stop and Take Pictures Like I'm a Psycho Stalker:

I SWEAR My Car Has the Best Lighting for Self-Portraits (also known as Time for an Intervention):

I Used to be a GD Genius:



Seriously, I used to be able to understand this shit. Today, I can only assume it's hieroglyphics.


Options for Robbing a Bank:






Cool Sky Stuff:

Chats With TILTE:



Click picture to enlarge lols.

And I'm just throwing this one in because I like to brag about my friends in high places.

That's right. Read em and weep.

I know this entry was a creative copout. I'm totally okay with that.

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