The Holiday Where the White Man Stole America.

I'm sure everyone enjoyed their Thanksgiving get togethers and I'm sure I could post 85 photos of autumn leaves and cornucopia that would look just like everyone else's. But I'm not going to do that to you. Instead, I'll just share some of the precious moments that may or may not have made my day a little more tolerable.

First we'll start with dinner at boyfriend's family's house.

I'm not a fan of deviled eggs... or pickles... or olives, for that matter (cheese and salami, that's another story). But this spread looked too retro and "holiday" to pass up.

A bottle of wine that comes with its own coonskin cap. If the drink sucks, at least you have a fascinator for your next Davy Crockett themed party.

It's almost impossible to enjoy Thanksgiving when you have a loose tooth and everyone within a 10 mile radius is trying to get their mitts on it.

Thanksgiving dinner #1: A meal fit for a king. And by king, I mean pig.

That's right. Three slices of pie in one sitting. Read em and weep.

An after dinner digestif, if you will.

Next. On to dinner with the Insane in the Membrane family. Only half of the TILTE bunch made it to the festive Horn of Plenty holiday because either A) we don't like each other, or B) we're too lazy. Which is totally fine with me because that means less effort pretending to be interested in stupid stories, less eyeballs bleeding from football on the living room TV, and less lurking on kids who you know are up to no good. I'm sure it was the same in every house you were in and you all know exactly what I'm talkin bout.

I attempted boyfriend's sister's recipe for Sweet Potato Casserole. Only, I forgot to check and see if we had the necessary utensils. No potato masher on hand? No problem. Use anything you have laying around the kitchen.

My Sweet Potato Casserole: Looking perfect.

My sister's Sweet Potato Casserole (that she forgot under the broiler): Looking like a pterodactyl did a drive by pooping. (click on photo for close up- it's better that way.)

Thanksgiving meal #2. My casserole success (along with casserole angel).

My BEAUTIFUL MADE-FROM-SCRATCH apple pie. :::hearts all over the fucking place:::

Unfortunately, that is NOT apple pie throw up. It's the inside of my beautiful pie. I've tried this recipe twice now and both times the apples have become obliterated. This is no fault of mine and I obviously blame the recipe.

There you have it. Stay tuned for "Christmas with TILTE". It should be equally nail-biting.


Kara said...

OHMYGOD I laughed so freaking hard at the pterodactyl poop. LOLZ

Megs said...

ALWAYS blame the recipe. That's generally been a successful strategy for me.

Ally said...

You crack me up! I love this post. Your apple pie looks lovely!

ps my word verification is suckfu weird ha ha!

AO xoxxo said...

Hysterical!!! Love the burnt sweet potatoes!

Nikosmommy said...

Never trust a broiler NOT to burn your food. Take your eyes off and the dish is as good as ruined!

Marie a la Mode said...

Your pie looks delicious! I would never how to make one from scratch. I'm hungry now!

Wombat Central said...

Girl, Martha would tote be proud of that square pie. You should market the hell outta your square pie. Like a square w/ the pi symbol inside it or sumfin. That's right. I'mma be your marketing genious.

Junket said...

Impressive. If you make something yummy for Christmas, post lots of pictures for me as it will be my only Christmas dinner. I'm not going home so the beags and I will be sharing our dinner with Stouffers.

Deborah said...

That's when apple pie tastes the best if you ask me.

Your crust looks flaky!

jess said...

wait, wait, wait... is that what happens when sweet potatoes burn?!?!
OMG!!!!!!!! this is a new addition to the list of reasons i don't like sweet potatoes: when burned the turn into pterodactyl poo!

Brooke said...

MMmm. I love deviled eggs. And TUMS after a meal is one of those things that makes my blood boil! Just eat less! Haha. Love how you refer to them as a digestif. In America, I think they are.

Kim said...

Hahahaha, pterodactyl poo potatoes! I envy your baking skills. I don't have the drive or the talent, but I can make a mean chicken breast.

(hah. breast.)

FabuLeslie said...

Mmm. Pie. Wait. You don't like deviled eggs OR pickles OR olives?? WTH?? I thought you and I were like food soul mates. Food mates. But now I read this and I'm all depressed and the first Saturday of my 2-week Christmas vacation is ruined. I'm going to go read about fondue now to lift my spirits and remind me of the times when I knew we were food mates.

StephanieC said...


I'm so hungry!

Your pie looks great. Does it still taste awesome even if the apples are obliterated? 'Cause if so, it's aaaaallllll good.

Jessica said...

I was going to post this under my comments, but didn't think you'd see it... try the Italian beef... soooooo good! I am not a fan of those peppers either, but the final taste just has a great Italian flavor to it. I pick the peppers out of my sandwich and would have no idea they (or the juice) was even a part of the dish if I didn't make it myself.

drollgirl said...

well now i am starving!

and i'll take all of the deviled eggs! lol

You're Lucky I Don't Have a Gun... said...

thanks for all the kinda words, but really, the pie sucked.

wombat- i'll let you know when i strike it rich.

jess- no, those weren't the sweet potatoes that burnt. those pterodactyl poops originally started out as cute little marshmallows.

leslie- thank you for going back to my fondue entry to remember the good times when our stomachs used to think alike. they WILL meet again some day.

PS: i can't believe how many people like deviled eggs.

Bonnie said...

Your made from scratch apple pie gave me a food-gasm and also made me sad at my three day old chicken sandwich on lame-ass country white bread that I am currently eating for lunch.
P.S. Your culinary skills make me die a little. Earlier, I was so proud of myself for making break-and-bake cookies. Now, I know that I suck at life.

I can't wait for tales from your Christmas adventures. I can only guess what awaits you.


Yvonne said...

I found you on Sprocket Ink, you're hilarious, just like me! About that pie....it looked awesome! Did you maybe use the wrong kind of apples? Seriously, some apples are wrong for baking, and some are good for baking, like Jonathon's or Granny Smiths. If you used something like a red delicious, well, they suck for baking and fall apart.

You're Lucky I Don't Have a Gun... said...

YVONNE - thanks for stopping by! as for the pie, i'm think i used granny smiths. whatever it was, it was what the recipe called for. so i'm pretty sure i'll just never use this recipe again.

© Things I Like to Eat (...and Other Nonsense), AllRightsReserved.

Designed by ScreenWritersArena