Wedding Dress Shopping. Ugh. (Part II)

Who knew wedding dress shopping would be so hard? You'd think with the intense amount of time I've spent studying these crazy bitches on Say Yes to the Dress, I'd know every detail of my dream dress, right down to what brand of thread I want.

But I don't.

And! guess what.

I actually already bought a wedding dress.

But I'm trying to sell it because I changed my mind about it, like, a week after I bought it.

Oh well, it was super cheap and I figured I could make my money back.

And! guess what again.

Remember when I said I already bought a wedding dress?

I actually already bought two wedding dresses.

But I'm not sure about this second one either.

Apparently, I have a problem when it comes to fancy things because I LOVE EVERYTHING AND WANT TO BUY IT ALL.

Just in case you thought the crazy stopped there, I have a history of buying too many wedding dresses.

The first time I got married, I changed my mind about my wedding dress a couple months before the wedding. I ended up selling that one on eBay.

And when I was in high school, I purchased several wedding dresses from thrift stores.

AND... When I was a kid, I used to write stories about getting married several times so I could have lots of different wedding dresses.

The crazy runs deep in this family.

So, my dresses: What's wrong with them?

Dress #1 I bought it at my first dress-trying-on appointment. It was on MAJOR markdown and the only one I had seen of its kind. I was worried that I might not be able to find something else this unique in my budget. I thought someone else would snatch it up and I would regret not having bought it. So I bought it and figured it would be easy enough to resell if I changed my mind on it. Once I started shopping around and honing in on *THE* style, I realized my mullet-dress wasn't going to make the cut.

Business in the front, party in the back.

Dress #2 I found it on Ebay while searching for vintage wedding stuff. I really thought it was going to be the one and was excitedly waiting for it to be delivered. The day it arrived, I tried it on right away. I was hoping for that stupid-ass "Say Yes to the Dress" moment- like angels would descend from the heavens above. But obviously that didn't happen. That's the problem with shopping online. I knew the dress measurements were slightly bigger than mine, but the dress was even bigger than I had anticipated. Also, I had ordered this dress with the hopes of having it altered to a new and improved version, something custom that *I* had created with my mind's eye. But my reflection wasn't showing a final product. Instead, it was showing sloppy mess of Ren Faire aftermath.

After taking the dress to a bridal seamstress, I learned it was going to be an additional $300 to make this my "dream" dress. That's when I decided to go back to searching through brand new dresses. Not that they would be any more affordable, but I figured I should really look around before I make another rash decision.

I went to a few more stores and narrowed it down to one particular style that I love. But I haven't pulled the trigger yet because that particular style costs, like, $40 million dollars. And it's also not a very common style, which means not many stores sell it.

So now I'm at an "expensive vs. risky" cross roads:

A) Pay a shitload of money for a beautiful dress that I'm only going to wear once (expensive).

B) Pay a somewhat reasonable amount for a dress that isn't my DREAM dress, but is still beautiful (expensive).

C) Pay a much more reasonable amount of money and commission an etsy store to make a copy of the original dress (risky).

D) Stick with my vintage dress and feel accomplished about saving money and somewhat designing my own dress (risky).

What would you do?

Sigh. Thank goodness this decision only happens once twice in your life.


aki! said...

If I were in your position, I'd go with option C. However... can't believe you got 2 dresses you didn't want.

I've seen a bit of Say Yes to The Dress, but I'm always floored by their budgets.

Ashley, The Accidental Olympian said...

You know, I thought I was going to be all kinds of good about my dress. Not buy the expensive one because it's only one day, but you know what, when I tried it on I did have that Say Yes To The Dress moment, and so I bought it.

And each time I've put it on for fittings since then I've died. I just love it. I will continue to love it, and I'm going to feel like a million dollars on that one day, so I'm happy with my choice.

So, I guess what I'm saying is if the budget allows, get whatever of those choices will make you happiest in your favorite dress.

So, basically this was no help at all. :)

Carrie said...

I'm in a very similar position right now! I am so indecisive when it comes to wedding dresses, and dress shopping is probably my least favorite thing in life right now. I've ordered two separate dresses from Nordstrom.com because they have a fabulous return policy and will accept returns on wedding dresses. That doesn't make me feel too bad about buying a dress online, and for cheap. I refuse to pay more than a certain amount for a dress I will only wear once.

I guess you have to decide if it's important to save money, or important to have a dress you REALLY REALLY love. It's tough, but you'll make a great decision at the end of the day!

Erin said...

I can't give good advice on this subject because I don't even know what I would do! I wore a dress I didn't love to my wedding, but I'm not convinced I would have loved any white dress. Why do they have to be white again? Ugh. I say keep shopping and get something reasonably priced. Stinking wedding industry is out to rob us all blind.

Mandy_Fish said...

How did I miss the fact that you've been married before?

My sister went to the fancy schmancy non-chain fabric store and asked them who the best dressmaker in town was. Then she snuck into a wedding dress shop and took a picture of a designer dress in the dressing room. (Big no no, I know.) Then she had a version of that dress made that was ridiculously beautiful for a reasonable price.


I can't help you from any personal experience. For my first wedding I picked some weird sort of 90s wedding dress suit thing with a huge scallop around the shoulders. Don't ask. For my second wedding I was very pregnant and wore a Gap maternity dress that wasn't white.

Simone DeBlasio said...

i think it's called say yes to THE dress, not multiple dresses.

you can sell anything on the internet.

Deidre said...

I'd go with Option D. At least will be the dress that you really want.

tara said...

Get the dress you really want. Especially since it's so important to you.

Also..what if you wore two dresses? Like wear one for the ceremony and change into another one for the reception so you can wear multiple dresses and not have to get remarried? :)

For my wedding I bought this dress that I love love love and had them put in a velcro hem that was hidden under the layers so I could take off the bottom part of the dress so I could dance. It was awesome!

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