On the bright side, today my friends sent me messages like these:
"Until you say otherwise, I'm just going to assume this is period related bullshit...."
"Is there any correlation to your food blog?"
"Your new boobs are gunna be great!"
" 'I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant...' "
"At least you have great socks on."
"What hospital are you at? I'm stopping by, with hipstamatic in tow."
"That sounds like a technical term for assplay."
"Pomise me you're not getting an abortion."
I love my friends. Srsly.