Sausagefest. Literally.

This past Memorial Day, we decided to throw an impromptu barbeque. Instead of doing the same old burgers thing, we went for an all-sausage menu: Italian sausage, bratwurst, kielbasa, and hot dogs for the kids.

Biscuit was ready at all times to catch any wieners on the loose.

We invited a couple of friends over and spent the evening relaxing around the grill.

The peppers were a great addition and added that certain je ne sais quoi. (I'm sure that's French for vegetable.)

Boyfriend had the fucking INGENIOUS idea to chop up all the sausages and make mix-n-match sandwiches. Topped with peppers and creamy dijon and served on a toasted roll, it was the kind of stuff dreams are made of.

After dinner, the kids played a riviting game of Gone Fishin'. Those fishing poles are surprisingly hard for small hands to maneuver.

The dessert fruit salad was courtesy of our guests. And since I'm a Fatty McSweetTooth, I topped it with Dream Whip.

Now that summer is here, we'll be keeping this menu on the shortlist.

Boner'ppetite!

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Pearl's First Trip to Disneyland: The FINAL Installment

Ok, I'm sure most of you have to be thinking "Fuck, MORE Disneyland pictures?? How many pictures can you take in one day????"

Joke's on you. I can take dozens of pictures of a fast food burger alone (just check my iPhone), so imagine the possibilities at a theme park!!!


TUESDAY

We decided to skip breakfast and take our time getting down to the park. Vicki and her family headed to Downtown Disney while Pearl watched cartoons (and I may or may not have straightened my hair).

Just before entering the park, Pearl snapped this beaut. It's a little washed out, but I tend to look better like that anyway.

Welcome to California Adventure!

The water rafting ride I was too chicken to go on because there was a dip involved and people screamed and no thanks.

My favorite ride in the park.

Pearl's favorite ride. At the end of it, Ariel and Prince Eric are animatronics waving at each buggy as it exits. Pearl and I waved back like they were human. One of us really believed they were. I'm not saying who but it was me.

A signature shot.

Pearl's face while we waited in the longest line ever, Toy Story. But even I have to admit, it was worth the wait and funner than I expected.

The Caesar Salad I ordered from the Mexican food stand. I'll tell you one thing, the food at California Adventure blows Disneyland's food out of the water. I equate Disneyland food with overpriced hospital cafeteria. The prices here were probably just as steep, but I felt like I was getting a quality meal, not some burger slop served up by Barth, the chef from You Can't Do That on Television. Also worth noting: THEY SELL BEER IN CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE.

Ever since we saw Puss N Boots, Pearl likes to break into "salsa mode" whenever the mood strikes.

Cotton candy was a dietary staple during this trip. I'm sure you're shocked.

AND YES! MORE RANDOM SHOTS FROM BOTH PARKS!

 Making our grand entrance on Main Street, USA.

My best Chip N' Dale impression while WEARING a Chip N' Dale hat. What's worse- that I was making this face, or that I actually make this face on a regular basis? The world may never know.

I love the face on the girl behind us. And no, there was nothing wrong with her so yes it is okay to laugh.

Someone's obviously way more interested in trying on "cute little hats!!!"

And probably my favorite shot of the day.

Wasn't that fun? It's like you just took a family vacation of your own, only you saved a shit-ton of money and didn't have to deal with all the annoyingly slow people and their 48-seater baby carriages.

Have a great weekend!!!

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Santa Barbara.

The weather was beautiful this weekend, so Boyfriend and I decided to go up to Santa Barbara for the day on Saturday.

This post is going to be picture heavy because it's basically a visual recap of our day in SB.


Starting the day off on a walk at the beach.


One of three weddings we saw getting set-up. I tweeted this pic saying I was at the Kardashian wedding. FYI: Nobody believed me.


Sunny, perfect weather. Lots of palm trees.


A path down to the water.


Lots of families riding rental bikes. Probably tourists.


I'm pretty sure I caught Biscuit mid-shake with this pic. Usually her face isn't this crazy looking.


My favorite shot of the day.


After the beach, we headed down to State St. For those of you who have never been to Santa Barbara, a walk down State St. is kind of like LA. -Minus the plastic surgery and nannies. -And with more granola-crunchers, rich white people, and spoiled college kids. I know what you're thinking. And yes, I fit right in.


I like the details around this hotel doorway.


Theatre marquee.


This was right after we saw David Spade and he pointed at Biscuit saying "Hey, look at that dog". Thankfully, Biscuit wasn't doing anything embarrassing at the time, like mauling small kittens, so I took it as a compliment.


We decided to stop for drinks and appetizers at Holdren's. By the way, if you're ever in Santa Barbara and you're looking for great food (on a fancier budget), GO TO HOLDREN'S. Hands down, the best steak I've ever had.


All orders come with complimentary bread. I'm not sure what the white bread was, but my guess would be a light sourdough. And the dark bread, I think, was a honey wheat. But the real magic comes in the dipping sauces. You get the standard butter, but then you also get this cracked out version of olive oil that makes you want to chug it by the gallon. Word on the street is, it's a special combination of cayenne pepper, garlic, and red wine that they add to it. It was so good, I was *this* close to throwing it back like a shot of Vodka.


Boyfriend ordered a Cucumber Martini, which uses Hendricks Gin (his favorite). I ordered a Blood-Orange Margarita, which comes with a salt/ sugar combo on the rim (a very nice touch). I can't vouch for the martini, but the margarita was very fruity and refreshing. A perfect drink for day out in the sun.


We ordered the Spicy Spinach and Artichoke Dip, which was served with homemade pita chips. This dip is very chunky and hearty. If you like big bites of artichoke, this is the one for you. Also, it doesn't seem very spicy in the first few bites, but trust me, the spice is there. I went at it like I was trying to win 1st place in an eating competition, only to come to a screeching halt when my mouth felt like burning hot lava.


We also ordered the Crab Cakes. I've only tried crab cakes once before, so I'm not exactly a crab cake connoisseur. But I can tell you that these cakes were fried and crisp on the outside, it broke apart easily with my fork, and the inside was moist, with the flavors of the ingredients all blended together perfectly. So I'd say they were pretty great. Also, the cakes were served on a bed of rice pilaf and came with a light and tangy sauce on the side.

Worth Nothing: Both times I've been to Holdren's, I had the same server. His name is Trevor and he is fantastic. If you end up going here, make sure to request his section. He is very happy and helpful, two great qualities that you want in a server.


One more important piece of info... I just learned this weekend that Santa Barbara has passed some kind of city code making all restaurants with outdoor seating "Dog-friendly". Crazy, right? I know, I'm really excited about this. Biscuit especially loved this when it came time to sniffing the edge of our plates and trying to sneak a stray bite.


Me and Boyfriend!


Until next time, Santa Barbara...

Boner'ppetite!

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Las Vegas.

Boyfriend and I went to Vegas last week for a MUCH needed vacation. It was seriously the best Vegas vacation I've ever had and I'll tell you why: No gambling, no partying. Don't get me wrong, I can do both of those and enjoy myself, but the point of this trip was to enjoy the amenities and come back home rested and relaxed. And that's just what we did.

Since I have a shit ton of photos to share, I'm just going to lay out here like this: Start to finish, what you would have experienced on a Vegas vacay with TILTE.

The drive from my house to Las Vegas is about 5 hours. Most of it is through the desert and this is pretty much all you see once you get through greater LA.




First stop- lunch on the go from Tommy's.

The hotel where we stayed.



Just kidding. This is an abandoned motel in the middle of nowhere. AKA Baker, CA.

The World's Largest Thermometer (I cannot verify the validity of this statement).

WE'RE FINALLY HERE!!!


WE'RE IN OUR HOTEL ROOM!!!




First thing we did was head straight down to the pool. If you've stayed at The Mandalay Hotel before, you know HOW FUCKING AWWWWESOME AND INCREDIBLE AND FUN AND RAD this pool is. If you haven't, it's kind of like a giant, deep rectangle and at the far end is a machine that makes a wave every couple of minutes. Not only is this pool sweet relief for burning hot third-degree-from-the-sun burns, it's also fun because you get swept away just like you're drowning in the real life ocean.

Boyfriend. (LOVE this shot.)

$8 beer. And it's not even the good kind. That's how Vegas rolls.

My audition reel for Dexter.

After scorching it up in the desert sun, we headed in for a nap. The nap ended up turning into a half-sleep and we woke up just after 9pm. Oh well, we're in Vegas. It's the city that never sleeps and we can still go anywhere for dinner! WRONG. Apparently the city DOES sleep and bedtime is 10pm. It's nearly impossible to find a restaurant with a full menu open late at night. STUPID. We lucked out and found an Irish Pub called Rí Rá in the walkway between Mandalay and Luxor.

My Stella Artois.

Boyfriend's Guinness. (Fun fact: This was the first time I've ever tried Guinness. Meh... I'm not a huge fan.)

My corned beef and cabbage. I love me some corned beef and cabbage... but this place was actually a letdown. The mashed potato and cabbage was good, but the corned beef was too dry. Take note, Ri Ra.

The chandeliers inside Ri Ra. (I wish I could take the credit for thinking up the brilliant idea of snapping chandeliers, but I got it from drollgirl. Genius.)

The next morning was breakfast-buffet-till-you-bust at our hotel.

Serving #1- The Greasies.

Serving #2: The Healthies.

Serving #3: The Cream of Wheat with butter and granola.

Yep. Three servings. (I actually took a photo of my hot bod when I was laying out at the pool, but I won't be posting that little gem because I look like pregnant-bloated-corpse-belly. Which is unfortunate because I am neither pregnant, nor am I a corpse.)

After breakfast we headed back down to the pool. After we clowned around in the hallway, that is.







Heads up- the drinks at the Mandalay pool bar are strong. I blame my intoxication on the bartender. That, and the roasting hot sun burning the sense out of me.





Poolside weinies.

After we'd made a hundred rounds in both the wave pool AND the lazy river, we headed to the room for a nap. (I'm a napper, okay.) That night, we took a stroll over to The MGM hotel and had dinner at a great Italian restaurant called Fiamma.

Chandelier inside Mandalay.

Chandelier inside Fiamma.

Boyfriend ordered the Gnocchi (potato dumplings) with lobster, mushroom, and truffles. I wasn't a huge fan of the gnocchi, which is surprising because I love both potato and pasta. -But the mushrooms, lobster, and sauce were FUCKING DELICIOUS.

I went safe with the meat lasagna.

Some shots on the walkways between MGM, Excalibur, Luxor and Mandalay.

"Ugh, I'm done taking pictures."

"JUST KIDDING! Take some more!!!!"

On our last morning in Vegas, we had breakfast at Hash House A Go-Go in the Imperial Palace. Two of boyfriend's coworkers recommended this place based on the Chicken and Waffles plate.

Chandelier inside Imperial Palace.

Boyfriend started out his meal with a Tallboy-in-a-Bag.

He went with the recommended Chicken and Waffles specialty.

I ordered the avocado/ onion/ bacon/ cheddar scramble with a side of potatoes, fruit, and biscuit. Everything was really good and VERY filling.

While we were in Vegas, my friend Vanessa tweeted that we should go to Freed's Bakery because it's only THEEE most well-known bakery in Vegas AND does the most wedding cakes in all the land. Well, that little "stop on our way out" turned into a 30 minute detour that took us all around greater Las Vegas because Freed's stupid website listed their OLD address. We ended up finding the place and I was super excited to order some cakes TO-GO since we'd just filled up on breakfast. Unfortunately, the woman behind the counter said their cakes wouldn't last a drive to LA unless they were in a cooler. Well, we had no cooler. And I was not about to let this bakery beat me. So we ordered a couple of non-perishable sweets and ONE cupcake that Boyfriend and I planned to split sometime during the drive home.

"Fuck you, cupcake."

As soon as we got back in the car, it started to rain. But desert rain isn't normal rain because it can go from 100 degrees and sunny to torrential downpour in a matter of seconds. I said a Hail Mary because I was sure we were going to get flooded away. We didn't.

Although the vacation was soooo nice, it was comforting to be back home. At least for a short time anyway. I'll be probably be dying for another vacation by the end of the month.

Hope you got to live vicariously through me on this wonderful trip to sin city!

Oh yeah- and after all that searching for Freed's Bakery, the cupcake lasted the drive home. Only I have no idea what it tastes like because I let my mom have it. Oh well. But I CAN say that the Cinnamon Crispy was mouth-watering, very inexpensive, and left me wanting more. Next time, Freed's.

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