Unbaby.me, You're a Genius.

Have you heard of the app called Unbaby Me?

I saw the creators on The Ricki Lake show (what.) and immediately I knew this app would be right up my alley.

Basically, it searches through the Facebook images your friends are posting and changes anything recognized as a baby and/or child to other enjoyable items, like walruses and bacon. It doesn't actually change the original image, it just changes what you, the app user, sees.

Ha! It's genius, right??

I know what you're saying. Yes, it's a little mean spirited, and yes, my hair does look good today. It's all in good fun though. I'm the first to admit pretty much every tyke's face that shows up in my Facebook feed is so ding-dang cute they all make me want to smother them. With kisses.

I just may have to put this sweet app to use soon. -Partly because my jealous, barren guts are crying on the inside. But also because my face is laughing on the outside.

I'm kicking myself for not having come up with this on my own.

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The Big Reveal: Halloween 2012

Did YOU guess what we were going to be for Halloween?

Several of you guessed correctly what both Eric and I were going as, but nobody guessed correctly on Pearl's costume.

Here it is. The moment you've all waited for since first clicking on this blog title two seconds ago.

Eric was. . . . . . . .

MC BAT COMMANDER, FROM THE AQUABATS!

For this costume, Eric ordered the cap, goggles, and shirt through The Aquabats website. He made the belt with blood, sweat, tears, and discount material from Joann fabric and craft. The shorts, socks, and Converse are all out of his wardrobe. And lastly, you can't forget the mustache (face paint) and missing tooth (tooth black-out).

Funny story about this costume: Pearl was trick-or-treating with her mom on Halloween night. Eric wanted to make her night (because she LOVES The Aquabats) by surprising her and fooling her into believing he really was the Bat Commander. As we drove down the street and found Pearl, we were both pumped and imagining that she would always remember the time she met her favorite superhero. As Eric ran up to where she was, scripted monologue in his head, she saw him and came running over yelling, "Daddy!!" Lol.

UPDATE: When Eric made his surprise appearance, he also took with him a letter he'd designed on mock Aquabats stationary. It read something like "Don't eat too much candy! Listen to your mom and dad! And don't forget to brush your teeth! -Love, Ricky Fitness."

Even though Pearl knew better than to fall for Eric's impersonation, she TOTALLY believed the letter was real because of the "authenticity" of the stationary. Apparently, she slept with it all night. Lol.


Pearl was. . . . . . . .

PUSS IN BOOTS!

Pearl's costume came together like a dream. I lucked out by finding an old Tigger costume at the thrift store. Two days, and an additional $5 later, my seamstress decapitated poor Tigg. Since the weather ended up being 5,000 degrees outside that day, I also ended up cutting off the mittened portion of the hands and turned the legs into shorts.

The thrift store provided the floppy, sun hat (still had the original tags from Charlotte Russe) and braided belt. I added a small stitch to the hat to keep one side up and I affixed an ostriche feather (from Michael's). The "boots" were pirate-type boot covers. I used fabric glue to add red ribbon trim and attached them to the Tigger suit. Those, along with the cape and fencing foil, were all from the Halloween store. The final touch was face paint. Eric took over on that part because my attempt the night before looked a lot less "Puss in Boots" and a lot more "Oompa Loompa on crack."

(Oompa Loompa on crack, doing an impersonation of Guy Fawkes, while firing his agent.)

Pearl and her "cousin", the Ninjago (my nephew, M, from Original Thoughts of an Unoriginal Thinker) 

Pearl was entered in the 4-6 age division of the costume contest. We made sure to tell her over and over how it doesn't matter if you win a prize or not, just have fun, yadda yadda, whatever, all those other things you say when you know you're going to win. We told her all of this knowing fully well she was going to clean house. And then the unthinkable happened. SHE.DIDN'T.EVEN.PLACE. She lost to a soap bar/ loofah combo (it was creative and homemade, so I concede they deserved it), Alfalfa from The Little Rascals (again, homemade and cute so it totally deserved it too), and the first place winner was. . .
. . .
. . .
fucking Jack Sparrow.
As in, the store-bought costume that's been played out for the past nine years. I was shocked when they announced his name, especially considering that when we first arrived all the kids were like "Look! It's Puss in Boots!!" AND she was the only Puss in Boots there. AND when we went trick-or-treating afterward, everyone was oohing and ahhing over her costume.

I should totally just be proud that Pearl was cool with not winning a prize and had fun regardless. But I'm not. Clearly, we know who needs to learn the meaning of "sportsmanship."


And lastly, I was. . . . . . . . .

MARY POPPINS!

I had been wanting to try this costume for several years, but for one reason or another, never got around to it. Surprisingly, it was easy to put together. I found a long, wool skirt and a white button down shirt at the thrift store. The hat was some kind of vintage, short-fur covered derby hat from Italy that I also snagged at the thrift store. I just crushed the top down and glued on the flowers and strap. The bow tie was from the Halloween store. The bag, umbrella, blazer, gloves, and boots were out of my wardrobe. I also made sure to part my hair down the middle and pin my bangs down, ala the Pringles mascot.

Surprise of all surprises, I ended up winning third place for the adult costumes! I guess that makes me feel a little better about Pearl not winning. (Not really, she was robbed.)

Graciously accepting my prize. 

Also, my sister and her other son, L, went as the Kia Hamsters. She made their heads out of paper mache and furry fabric and glued witch nails onto furry gloves. She wore giant sweats and stuffed the hips with canteens. (Based on this picture, you'd never know she's stick thin.) L ended up winning a prize for his age division. Yay!!!  (Again, Pearl's group was rigged.)

And how could I forget Biscuit, the latest addition to The Harlem Globetrotters??

So those were our costumes this year.

What did you and your friends/ family go dressed as??

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Two Halloween Videos to Hold You Over.

Happy Halloween! Do you celebrate Halloween? I'm sure you do. Because people who don't like wasting money to dress up like a fool every year probably don't bother reading nonsense blogs like this.

I've taken the liberty of stealing drollgirl's blog post today and sharing les mots sombre of Henri the cat.

Henri, l'Haunting. Enjoy.

And now I leave you with a scary song. A song that I played the other day while I was home alone because I thought I was brave, but then immediately turned it off.

If you don't recognize this song, I don't even know why we're friends.

(If you're scared, just pretend you're watching a commercial for a PMS drug or some kind of feminine product. The elevator scene lends itself especially well to this notion.)

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Some Pre-Halloween Nuggets.

This past weekend was the annual Halloween costume contest. I LOVE Halloween and I always have a special place in my heart for 1. creative costumes and 2. costumes that took some homemade effort. (Speaking of creative and homemade, did you guess what the three of us are going to be? Click here to see the clues.)

Here are some shots of the costumes we saw out on display.

Robot

Marty the Zebra, from Madagascar 3

Fionna, from Adventure Time 

The Exorcist, complete with green contact lenses. 

 Dia de los Muertos

Alfalfa, from The Little Rascals 

Abraham Lincoln (Every time I see this picture, I think of THIS.)

Noteworthy conversations from this weekend...

Did I ever tell you that my mom thinks I'm the meanest thing on the planet? Every now and then she likes to remind me about it. While on a phone call with my mom, she said to me: "I'm going to sprinkle you with holy water and then step back to avoid the sizzle." 

While driving home last night, the song Ghostbusters, from Ray Parker Jr. came on. I said to Eric: "They played this song at the costume contest and I got chills. If we lived on another planet where everyone had theme music, I'd want this to be my song. You know, so every time I'd enter a room, this song would play. And I'd make sure to walk in like a Ghostbuster, too."

Lastly...

I entered Biscuit in a local "pet costume" contest on Facebook. I don't know what the prize is, but seeing as how I'm broke, I'll take it, whatever it is. So this is where I get all desperate and beggy. Please go HEEEEEEEEEEEEERE and vote for Biscuit's costume. And make sure to select the VOTE button (not the typical "Like" button). All of the other contestants are wearing actual "dog costumes", while Biscuit's is real people clothing. I found it at a local thrift store for $1.99 and HAD to have it. When I tweeted about it, Wombat Central was like "You should totally put that on Biscuit." And I was like "Ha. That's funny." And then I was like "Fuck. I totally SHOULD put this on Biscuit." (Thanks for the suggest, Wombat.). Anyway, it will take 3 seconds to vote and there's no sign up or anything weird required.

Also, it looks like you can vote every day. So, feel free to vote for Biscuit for the next three days!!!

:)

Thanks!!!!!!

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A Sneak Peak at Our Costumes: Can You Guess?

Eric and I will be taking Pearl to an annual Halloween event tomorrow. Since she'll be with her mom on Halloween night, this daytime version gives me her a chance to bask in the costumed glory of Halloween twice each year.

Here are some sneaky peakys at all three of our costumes. Can you figure out what they are? (Hint: None of the costumes have anything to do with the other.)


My character is a female. This is her hat.

Eric's character is a male. This is his symbol.

This is Pearl's character. He's an animal.

Any guesses???

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Wordless Wednesday.

In a galaxy far, far away: Chewbacca Pearl waits patiently while we shop for clothes.

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Pear, Bacon, and Bleu Cheese Pizza.

This isn't so much a "recipe" as it's more just me posting pictures of this delicious pizza we made. If you're looking for a new combination of toppings for your own homemade variations, I highly suggest these.

We used Trader Joe's Herb & Garlic pizza dough. (Originally I attempted a recipe from scratch, but it ended badly as a sticky pile of nasty.) Top with a light layer of grated Swiss and Gruyere.

Add medium-cooked bacon pieces, bleu cheese, chopped pecans, and sliced pears. Finish with another light layer of Swiss and Gruyere. Tip: Don't slice your pears until the moment you're ready to use them. Otherwise, they'll turn brown and people will be like "Ew, what's that? I hate brown stuff! Gross!!" And then you'll be like "They're just pears! They still taste fine, I swear!" And then people will never trust your cooking again and they'll hate you forever.

Admiring my masterpiece. My hair has rabies.

Cook according to the directions on the Trader Joe's dough. I think it was 20 minutes at 400 degrees, but don't quote me on that.

Eat a lot. The pears make it healthy.

On a related note, the pizza pan we use is the Cooking With Calphalon Pizza Pan (Google Affiliate Ad) from Kohl's. We've only had it for a short time, but have already used it several times. The verdict: The crust comes out perfect and crispy on the outside/ soft on the inside. Never soggy or burnt. It's nonstick, lightweight, and cost about 1/3 less than its competitor's "pizza stone" product. Great purchase.

Boner'ppetite!

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A Day in Ojai.

Ojai is a small town located about 80 miles north of Los Angeles. It's known for being a prime getaway spot for the rich and famous. Most of the town shops boast "all natural" and "organic" products (see: expensive).

Even though I grew up just 30 minutes away from Ojai (pronounced O-hi), I rarely went there. It's a drive through the mountains and always seemed much farther than it really is.

A few weekends ago, Eric and I decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather and spent the afternoon there.

Our first stop was a restaurant called Feast Bistro. I'd done some internet researching and found this place to be recommended by lots of people. It fit our dining criteria (good looking food, not too pricey, located in the middle of town) and we were both eager to try it out.

The restaurant itself was small and homey. There was also a nice patio area closed in with tall shrubs and twinkly lights.

The open-concept kitchen was right across from our table and I had a prime spot for watching all the action go down. The two chefs seemed like they were buddies, cracking jokes while making meals. They even came over and asked how our food was and we had some small talk. It was a really laid back, friendly atmosphere.

Eric ordered the pulled pork sandwich and I got the burger. Both were EXCELLENNNNT.

Look at all that crispy cheese! Drool.


After lunch, we walked around the downtown section. Which is all of one block, so that didn't take much time. We also stopped into a dimly lit bar that had six other people in it, including the bartender. Two of them had limps, two walked out of a trick door/ wall, one went into the bathroom and never came out, and one was a pirate dressed in Harley-Davidson attire. The jukebox was playing a slow, solem cover of Prince' When Doves Cry. I expected Laura Palmer to come walking in at any moment.

We came across this stairwell that led up to the post office bell tower. Too bad it was no longer open for everyday people to hastily climb up and risk their lives on.

We rode the trolley all through town. It was only $1 per person and a great way to get a lay of the land. It wasn't like the usual touring trolley that shows you town highlights- it was actually Ojai's version of a city bus. So we really got to see shops and neighborhoods we would have never discovered on our own. Like the Ojai Valley Inn and Spa, where the rich and famous stay.

Peace out, trolley.

We also saw a couple having their wedding photos taken at this beautiful venue, The Lavender Inn. Watching their awkward, posed stances made me cringe and I couldn't bring myself to include them in my photo.

We exited back at our original stop and grabbed some goodies before heading back home.

If you've never been to Ojai and you're in the general area, I'd definitely suggest stopping by. It has a different feel from the surrounding areas- almost like you're not in California anymore. The shops are pretty pricey, but you can easily spend a couple of hours here on the cheap.

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